If you’re a therapist in private practice or even in some community settings, you’ve experienced the challenge of this decision before. Many of us become accustomed to charging clients for therapy sessions or for their copays/deductibles when the client attends a session, even if we feel conflicted about the amount we charge or the amount insurance will pay for. 

We recognize that we are service providers with a tremendous amount of training and education, even if we struggle with self-doubt - a common experience for sensitive therapists. We know we deserve to be paid for the services we provide - just as a speech pathologist or a hair stylist deserves to be paid for their services. Even if we’re not fans of capitalism, we understand that everyone needs to make money to live, and that includes us.  

However, when we have a client who cancels a session late, it can suddenly feel veeeery different.

When the world feels bleaker than usual, I get into reading dystopian novels. There’s something about escaping into an even more difficult world that’s appealing. I can wholeheartedly focus on how these other people are trying to survive and adapt in incredibly difficult circumstances. At least it’s not that bad here, I tell myself as I lean into perspective-taking and distraction.

The heaviness of being utterly worn out. We’ve all been there, we’re there right now, or we’ll be there again. As Hemingway wrote, “the world breaks everyone.” Being human means that we’ll know loss and struggle, that there’ll be times when life goes along with ease and times when it’s all we can do to slowly inch our way through the muck. Of course, our highly sensitive natures can be especially impacted when we’re consumed with struggle.

We live in a world filled with pain. Tragedies, mistreatment, and suffering are all around us. And, in the face of such difficulty, gratitude can feel trite. However, as highly sensitive therapists, we are very experienced with the concept of both/and.

We live with a mantra of:

My peace does not diminish another’s war.

My joy does not diminish another’s sadness. 

My love does not diminish another’s loss.

Our caring, deeply thoughtful brains and souls can allow both.

Are you a mental health therapist who has opened your laptop to start a telehealth session only to find that your computer has decided to require an update at-this-exact-inopportune-moment? Or, who has logged in to a platform to do something you've done 100 times before only to find that it's changed, and now you're confused? Who has seen a message from a client pop up and then forgotten to respond as you got pulled into the demands of your day? Not to mention, who has done the dreaded - double-booking of clients?? <shudder, shudder>